November 18, 2009

Talk. Listen. Repeat.

Some people like a challenge. It makes them work harder- try to prove something to themselves or others. I guess I fall into that category most of the time, but recently it's been hard for me to get through the D stuff with a smile on my face and my usual unwavering fighting spirit. The numbers make me angry. The cost worries me. I have lost sleep over the minute details of diabetes too many nights to count.

It's no wonder that the needs of the one person in the center of all this- Noah - the most important person, in fact, get lost in the shuffle. My mind is constantly on numbers, strips, ratios, research, money...
Yes, all that is important and won't go away, but I realized recently that paying so much attention to those details has taken my focus away from helping Noah with the challenges he faces every day. I'm so used to being a cheerleader- encouraging Noah to go with the flow and, doing the whole, "we're not afraid of dumb old type 1 !" thing , that I fail to see that he might be struggling in his own way.

It's time to stop, keep quiet and really listen to Noah without jumping up all full of piss and vinegar wanting to conquer his fears. I might be surprised to find he doesn't want a cheerleader...just a mom.


meanderings said...

Hi Lea!

You raise a good point. Although, I'm not a parent of a child with diabetes, I often think about all of you and know it has to be difficult to let your child, be a child - I have a hard enough time letting me, be me -